Here continuing with Self-Correction and Self-Commitment from writing and Self-Forgiveness on Day 164: Trust - A Romantic-Mind-Fantasy - Part 1.
SELF-CORRECTION AND SELF-COMMITMENT STATEMENTS
When and as I see that I am
and/or attempting to place my trust in others as per my romantic ideas,
thoughts, imaginations in relation to Trust, I stop and breathe. I realize that I am forcing and/or attempting
to force myself as my mind onto others as a way to try to manipulate, control,
and influence others to act in a way that benefits me as a mind and gives my
mind ‘life’ and makes my imaginations, ideas, thoughts, beliefs, and
definitions real. Additionally, I
realize that, with my imagination I construct, accept, and allow what works
best for me and me alone, so to continue to accept and allow myself to
manipulate and control others with Trust is selfish, one-dimensional, and does
not align with my decision to expand my awareness and actually care for the
beings outside of myself.
I commit myself to stopping
placing my trust in others by reminding myself of the nature/starting-point of
myself within and as my desire to place my trust in others in the first place
which is for my benefit only – as a being and as a mind – to manipulate and
control others so that I do not have to change.
Instead, I direct myself to change, to be the change, and to actually
allow myself to care for others with the decision, into a moment of breath, to
not knowingly manipulate and attempt to control others.
When and as I see that I am
attempting to make myself believe that I can trust others to do ‘what’s right’
or ‘what is best’, I stop and breathe. I
realize that this belief is SO not realistic and all deception – I mean, if it
was aligned with me as equality and oneness, as who I am at a
beingness-level, and what’s actually
best, I wouldn't have tried over-and-over-and-over again to make myself believe
that Trust, as per my romantic-imagination-mind definitions, is real.
I commit myself to stop attempting to make myself believe
that I can trust others to ‘do what’s right’ or ‘do what’s best’ by no longer
accepting and allowing myself to go into the deception and self-separation –
and, instead, allow my awareness to expand to see the world and all of us
beings within/on/as it and acting for/in/as a way that is best for us all as a
group – this is real trust.
When and as I see that I am living or attempting to live by
my self-interested definition of ‘what is best for all’ as ‘what is best for
ME’ by intentionally directing a situation in a way that avoids conflict, emotional turmoil, someone taking something personal, and/or any negative outcome so that
I am not ‘inconvenienced’, I stop and breathe.
I realize that this is for my own benefit and does not assist and
support myself and/or others to expand situations/events/problems with
understanding and coming to solutions, as inter-personally and as a group,
that are agreed are best and workable for all.
I commit myself to no longer live out a self-interested
definition of ‘what is best for all’ and instead live ‘what’s best for all’ as
directing myself and myself within potential conflict situations with assisting
and supporting myself and others to investigate the problem, placing solutions
that are worthwhile and/or equally beneficial to everyone, and living/walking/being
the solution.
When and as I see that I am attempting to make others happy
and/or make it possible for others to have a positive experience with me as to
build Trust, I stop and breathe. First,
I realize that I am attempting to manipulate others into a Trust relationship
with me and second, I realize that it’s not practical, realistic, nor possible
to make anyone outside of myself do/feel/think/be any way that is not their decisions
to do/feel/think/be.
I commit myself to stop attempting to make others happy
and/or try to create positive experiences for people for my own benefit. I remind myself that happiness and positive
experiences are energetic reactions, energy never lasts and so the happiness
and positive feelings do not last – it is not real. It is actually physically impossible to make
another and/or be a catalyst of others happiness and positivity for the
long-term. So, instead of using my time
to manifest Trust from manipulation, deception, and physical impossibilities, I
commit myself to work on changing my self-communication and interpersonal
communication from self-interest for positive energy to awareness,
understanding, clarity, and specificity.
When and as I see myself going into the negative polarity of
giving up on others, wiping my hands clean of others, abdicating my
responsibility for others, and not allowing myself to be/become aware of the
possible consequential outcomes of my actions and words within and as
interpersonal communication, I stop and breathe. I realize that I am acting/speaking as if I
have free will and/or a choice to walk away from the messes I leave behind with
the assumption/expectation that others are responsible to sort through the mess
and clean it up for themselves – when the reality is that it’s not best if I
walk away and do not take responsibility for others because of the mess, as
consequence and as the things I ‘try to forget’, will keep building and
building and growing and growing until the stuff is so deep that I have to face
it.
I commit myself to take responsibility for my words and
actions by allowing myself to be aware of the potential consequential outflows
and by working on directing myself accordingly as what’s best for all – within
this I will be taking responsibility for others by not creating a platform for
others to accumulate unnecessary consequence for themselves. It’s a win-win –
the less consequence I create for myself, the less mistakes I have to go back
and fix, and the more this frees all of us up to work on what’s immediately
here rather than adding more on to what we already are required to do.
When and as I see that I am wanting and/or desiring to place
myself as my Trust in the hands of another from the starting point of
desiring/wanting/needing to prove that my romantic-mind-imagination of Trust is
real and to prove that physical reality is not real/wrong, I stop and
breathe. I realize that I am approaching
Trust via my mind’s filter where I disregard what I am shown in physical
reality and where I do not value myself as Life as indicated by my willingness
to give pieces/parts of myself to something else to maintain an imagination
and/or illusion.
I commit myself to stop filtering Trust via my
romantic-mind-imagination filter and within this commitment I will assist and
support myself with my process of stopping myself from separating myself from
myself. When and as the
romantic-mind-imaginations of Trust come up, I stop, I breathe, and I do not
participate and I do not go there – I commit myself to no longer feed this
imagination with energy and allow myself to let go of this imagination and to
no longer exist within and as me.
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