Thursday, July 18, 2013

Day 147: There's Always Going To Be Something

Part Two of Self-Correction and Self-Commitment statements for Self-Forgiveness statements on Day 145: Hearing What I Want To Hear.  Part One is here.

When and as I see that I am judging myself for not doing enough when looking at what I have accomplished and comparing it to the to-do-list in my mind - I stop, I breath, and I bring myself back to here.  I see, realize, and understand that when I'm following the to-do-list in my mind that it is unlikely that I will ever do enough because I will always find something that needs to be done so that I do not allow myself to be present and here in breath.  Within this, I see that this is yet another 'carrot' that I've put in place for myself to chase after and keep myself distracted from what actually is important for me to get done everyday for me to build self-trust.

I commit myself to working on stopping my mind to-do-list by going back to my physical to-do-list - my list of things that I would like to accomplish within a day, every-other-day, and each week - and refining it to work with the changes that I've made in my living.

When and as I see that I am reacting to my real and/or imagined expectations of myself with anger, I stop and breath until I am clear.  I see, realize, and understand that this anger isn't going to change anything and it's unnecessary.  I mean, why allow myself to get caught up in and distracted by the anger?  This is a perfect time to re-direct myself - instead of getting caught up in the anger, I can look into the anger for a point of self-dishonesty.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to no longer react in anger to my real and/or imagined expectations of myself by breathing, reminding myself that no change will come if I continue to react, and investigating myself in that moment for the point of self-dishonesty that created such an intense reaction within and as me.

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