Day 128: The Day I Fell - Self-Commitment

Traumatic Event 2

Day 124: The Day I Fell
Day 125: The Day I Fell - Self-Forgiveness
Day 126: The Day I Fell - Self-Realizations
Day 127: The Day I Fell - Self-Correction
Here I am writing Day 128: The Day I Fell - Self-Commitment



I commit myself to no longer allowing myself to push others by placing a guard on my thoughts and practicing counting my words.

I commit myself to push through my own resistances and challenge myself.

I commit myself to no longer allow myself to take others reactions within an event or situation personally by reminding myself that whatever another is experiencing is not actually about me and to instead look at my own reactions which are an indicator of where I am not being honest with myself.

I commit myself to no longer express the Words 'Standing Up' as 'Fighting' and instead practice simply standing, breathing, being here, being honest with myself, when to be silent and when to speak. 

I commit myself to no longer make every event, situation, and experience about my own self exclusively and reminding myself that I am sharing this world with others who are equally experiencing events and situations.

I commit myself to no longer allow myself to do what I want and/or what's important to me only by practicing giving as I would like to be given and equalizing those things with what I require for my self-development.

I commit myself to no longer accepting and allowing myself to be The Helpless Victim by assisting and supporting myself to write out this character, using the tool of self-forgiveness, and redefining my living with self-correction.

I commit myself to stop looking for shame and compassion in others and to instead change myself in response to my own shame and align myself with compassion.  When and as I see that I am looking to others to show me what I want, I remind myself that these are flag-points for me to align to become a person that is in-fact Good and can be Trusted.

I commit myself to remind myself that the only way I can fall is if I believe in a definition of myself and that when I say or think, "I Am ...", that whatever it is must be written out, self-forgiven, and self-corrected.  I see, realize, and understand that at this stage, the self-definitions I have created for myself are dishonest and are the cause/catalyst of a lot of my stress, trauma, and conflict.

I commit myself to no longer allow myself to blame others for the consequences that have emerged for the decisions that I have made.  Instead I take responsibility for my decisions and consequences by changing what I able to change and walking with what I cannot change until I can change.  

I commit myself to no longer allowing myself to be/become a Skilled Manipulator as this character/personality is dishonest and has no integrity. I commit myself to stop this personality/character with writing, self-forgiving, and self-correction.

I commit myself to stopping my guilt by seeing my guilt as a flag-point of where I am not being honest with myself - I assist and support myself with self-forgiveness when and as the guilt emerges.

I commit myself to stop running from myself by reminding myself that if I do not stop, face myself, and change that whatever I am running from will continue to happen over-and-over-and-over again and that eventually, there will be nowhere left to run because I'll be dead.  Within this, I commit myself to no longer allow myself to squander away my one life for fear of myself and what will become of me.