Why Must I Know About Everything?
?
In this blog, I will be walking the dimensions of my Curious Character. To see how I got to here, read Day 107: Journey To Life Review - Day 2 - Part 6, Day 106: Journey To Life Review - Day 2 - Part 5, Day 105: Journey To Life Review - Day 2 - Part 4, Day 104: Journey To Life Review - Day 2 - Part 3, Day 103: Journey To Life Review - Day 2 - Part 2 and Day 102: Journey To Life Review - Day 2.Thought Dimension
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to activate my Mind Curiosity when and as I think and/or experience myself within the Words, "I Don't Know."
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the trigger Words, "I Don't Know," to activate my participation within and as my mind - where, if my mind does not provide me with the answers I need at that moment by presenting me with 'blankness' and/or not enough information, I will then allow myself within and as my mind to direct myself to how I can find the answer in the quickest way possible via my actions in my physical world.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as my physical body to be directed by myself as my mind toward the easiest, quickest way to satiate my curiosity and/or find an answer to something that I do not have experience with.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to consider the consequences as future outcomes of myself physically following my mind curiosity.
Imagination Dimension
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider the consequences of my actions/reactions when I become Curious because I tell myself that I do not have to consider the consequences and imagine how 'Only good things will come', "I will be a better, wiser, and more valuable person to others", and no matter what, in the end, I am always 'The Star', 'The Hero', 'The Best', 'The Comedian' and 'The Most'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, within and as my imagination, show myself how amazing an experience is going to be and how I am going to be a better person because of it and so nothing bad could happen - it's all good, man!
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to direct myself according to what I show myself within my imagination is going to be Good for me in the end. Instead of considering how my decisions and directions effect others, myself, and my future self within and as my self-development, I will act on what ever I see will benefit me only as my self image.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to tell myself that when I act on my imaginations without considering the consequences that I am 'Living In The Now' and 'In the Moment' - instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that I am NOT in the Now or the Moment, I am in the future where from within my imagination, I drive myself to get to my desired imagined outcome instead of stopping myself, breathing, and considering the Pros-and-Cons/consequences of what I would like to do.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when and as I imagine that something 'bad' could happen as a result of my actions, I brush it off and say, "Bah! It's gonna be fine! I can handle any negative outflow consequences. I'm tough!" I see myself as smiling and standing strong. I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that this is NOT true and that I require very little to make myself unstable.
Internal Conversations/Backchat/Voices in the Head
I will write self-forgiveness for my internal conversations and backchat in a private Backchat Diary.
Reaction Dimension
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to my fear of not knowing with anxiety - and because I do not like this negative emotional experience of myself, I will activate my mind curiosity with which will either present me with answer that I'm looking for or direct me to how I can find out the answer.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react positively with excitement and/or elation when and as I have 'pulled-off' my plan of action from a point of curiosity and thus get to see the outcome unfold and/or I obtain the knowledge and information required to satiate my curiosity. I have not seen, realized, nor understood my starting point within this is that I want to experience myself as smart, doing the right thing, worthy, clever, knowledgeable and bright.
Behavior Dimension
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lock myself into a Curious physical expression when and as I participate with Mind Curiosity. When I pull myself into myself, grab my chin, and pull at my lips, I have not seen that this is not a true expression of myself that it is a learned expression that I picked up from outside of me from those that I interpreted as being 'Curious-Looking'.
In the next blog, I will be walking the Fear Dimension of this character.
Imagination Dimension
Imagination Dimensi
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
When I was
a child I was aware that what I accepted as information and knowledge
became me and because I was not in agreement with others in my
environment and did not trust them, I would not allow others, to the
best of my ability and awareness, to influence or create who I Am
-unless- they showed me via combined spoken words and actions that they
cared for me and were looking out for what was best for me - these
individuals were rare. So, from a fear survival and fear of loss of
self as I developed Who I Am during my childhood phase before I started
Thinking, I interacted with and explored my world Physically as what I
could prove to be true on my own was what I could trust.
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
Note: I was not in agreement with others because their Words did not align with their living. I could not make sense of this. And it's interesting to look at pictures from when I was a child at this time because the expression on my face was if I was saying, "This does not make sense." As I got older, I assumed that it would all make sense when I 'grew up' but it never did.
Anyway, the core-source-origin point of my Curiosity was fear of survival and loss of self and when I began Thinking, it became Mind Curiosity. - See more at: http://self-commitment-of-carrie.blogspot.com/#sthash.wwg2V3P1.dpuf
